What In the Yell?!?

I'm southern to the core. I was born and raised in a small town in South Carolina by parents who were raised in a small town in Georgia. We drawl out words so long that you wonder if we are going to finish a sentence, but it's smooth and easy on the ears. There's my accent, the way I decorate my house, and I'm what some may call half southern belle and half redneck. I also talk loud. It's in my blood. There were always a lot of people around so to be heard, you had to talk loud. I had one brother and eleven cousins. We were LOUD! Then, I became a PE teacher. So, what do I do for a living? I talk loud. I have lived in East Texas for the past 15 years, and honestly, it's not different from where I grew up. We still talk loud!

In the south, athletics reign supreme, especially football. What do I do at sporting events? I yell! And, I'm not shy about it. It comes honestly, because I always here the story about how my papaw received a technical foul from the stands during one of my aunt's basketball games. He was not shy about letting the refs know when he had a problem with a call. My grandparents were also season ticket holders for Georgia Bulldogs football for more than 40 years. They were what we like to call passionate about the game and their beloved "Dawgs". My mama was the same way, but the sport she really loved to watch was college basketball.

Yelling for our team (Go Clemson Tigers!) by using my cheerleader voice, and what I'm about to talk about are two different things. Most of the time, I am a calm, laid back person. It takes quite a bit to get me upset, until my kids show up with a sass mouth or bad attitude! The other thing that can set me off in a hot minute is when I've asked the kids to do something 5,247,893 times, and they still haven't done it. Or, if I say exactly what I mean, but they interpret it in their own way, which is usually the total opposite of what I've asked them to do. These three things make me go from a princess to a demonic presence in about 3 seconds flat. You know that part of the movie "The Exorcist" where the little girl's head spins around and pea soup flies out? Well, if one of my kids says something sassy and disrespectful, that is exactly what I look like, except, my LOUD words are spouting out like the pea soup. If those portions of my life were a movie, the song in the background would be DMX's "Up in Here" because all I can think of at those moments is "Y'all gone make me lose my mind. Up in here. Up in here." If I look at this in a positive way, I could say that I'm being like Jesus when he became angry at the people for selling things at the temple.

Do you ever have a moment when your kids are being crazy people, and you lose it? I do! Sometimes, I don't even remember what I've said, but I know it was loud. It takes me a minute to gather myself after the fact. Yelling doesn't happen with my students at school, but it does with my kids at home. It just drives me t-totally insane when I've told my kids to go pick up your clothes off the bathroom floor, and what they hear is, "go get my toys out and start playing hide and go seek until mom loses her ever loving mind." My kids are insanely smart, but they are kids. They are going to test the waters within an inch of losing their lives...or me losing my sanity.

So, I've decided I'm going to try something new. Not only will it keep me sane, but I can freak my kids out a little (which is always funny). I'm going to start creepy whispering when they can't seem to follow directions, act like they can't hear what I'm saying, or look at me like I'm not speaking their native tongue.

I will never claim to be a perfect parent because that would not only be a lie, but I would probably be greeted at the gates of Hell by Satan himself for even claiming that I am. Parenting advice is great, and I love it, but I also want people to know that they are not alone in this crazy world of being parents. Being a parent is something I always dreamed of doing. I would not trade it for anything in this universe, but while I am being a mom, I would like to keep my sanity and not end up in the behavioral health unit in East Texas.

When Your Get Up and Go Has Got Up and Gone

 

 Over the past few months, I have been questioning every part of who I am. For the most part, in theory, I am a lackluster mom, an okay wife, a not so good friend, and a mediocre PE teacher. My get up an go feels like it got up and went...away. Far away. My day starts around 5:30-5:45 am, and doesn't end, most nights, until around 11:30-12:00 pm. So, where did my mommy mojo go, and why is the cup almost empty? There are many people who feel this way at different times in their lives, so I want you to know that you are absolutely not alone.

Disclaimer: In writing all of this, I am not saying that I do not want to work. I am saying that I would like to be in a position to be better for God and for my family. And, I'm also struggling with the issue of is this God trying to tell me I need to go in a different direction, or is this Satan telling me lies. The struggle is real!

Each morning, my alarm goes off at 5:30 and at 5:45 (I'm not going to lie. I set two alarms because I am so tired in the mornings). As I stumble around to get ready for the day, all I can think about is how much sleep I'm not getting and how tired I am. Now, what should be running through my head is how thankful I am that God has chosen to give me another day here on this earth. If my husband or kids speak to me before there's an adequate amount of "wake up" time or coffee, I snap at them and am so cranky. Like the "Walking Dead" zombies or those zombies in "World War Z". Things have to be timed just right in the mornings. If they are not, I am late for work. So, once I'm ready and have made sure my 4 year old stays on the straight path for the door (thank goodness for my husband who gets our little boy dressed each morning!), because we have detours nearly every morning, we are out the door before 7:00 am. Yes, this means he is at school around 7:20 every morning so that I can be at work by 7:30. So basically, I get into my car feeling drained and guilty, and the day hasn't really even gotten started yet. My husband takes my girls to school, which is a complete blessing! There is joy in the car ride to take Luke to school. We do get to talk about his friends and how he is going to work really hard to be on the green smiley face for the day, not yellow or red. The daycare he is in is great! It is actually a part of our church, and the kids that attend the pre-K program there are nearly 100% ready for kindergarten. But, the down side to this (there's always two sides) is that leaving him there is torture! He is there nearly 10 hours of the day. He begs me not to leave him there every morning, and there are more days than not that he is crying for me to take him home. There are so many days, especially in the last few months, that I just want to get up, even if it is at 5:45, make breakfast for my family, enjoy my family, then take each of my kids to school. Then, I would like to be able to come back to the house, and get things ready for the rest of our day, like prepping for dinner, and gathering things for soccer or piano practice. Right now, I leave the house before 7 a.m., and most nights, do not enter the door, again, until after 8 pm. Now, I could tell my kids no more extracurricular activities (which they are really good at all of them and enjoy them), but I would go from being an "okay mom" to just being a flat out "crappy mom". My kids are already letting me know that they want more time with me. And let's face it, when I am with them, I'm zoned out, not really listening to the actual important things they have to tell me because I'm mentally drained. I used to make excuses and defend my reasons for having other things to do, but now, to me, those are no longer valid reasons. It just seems flat out selfish!! My kids are growing up fast. There are so many things that I'm missing or that my mind isn't present for even if my body is.

All of these things also apply to my husband, not just my kids. He deserves to have the best of me, also. There are so many days I would rather just come home, take a bath, and go lay down in the bed and go to sleep. Now, I do not do this, but at the same time, my brain is asleep instead of giving him some undivided attention. So, when he is trying to tell me something or talk about something, my mind is drifting to other places. And, it's not that I don't want to listen to what he has to say. I actually do. I hear him talking, but there are so many times that I'm just not listening. Why? Because, again, I'm mentally zoned out. So am I being a Proverbs 31 wife? Am I following my directions from God? No. I'm not. If you read Proverbs 31: 10-31, it speaks of a wife that is worth far more than rubies. Nope. Not a jewel of any kind right now. It also mentions how "she brings him good, not harm". I'm not making him miserable, but I don't want to ever put him in a position where I feel like I'm bringing him down. Now, in verse 17, it speaks of a vigorous worker, which I am vigorous, but at this point, I'm not joyful in my work. In verse 15, it talks about providing food for her family. Well, unless it's fast food (not all the time, but a lot), I'm slacking there, too. My body is present for my family, going through the motions, but I want my brain to be there, too. I'm missing some really good moments and conversations.

Supper? Who gets to fix supper? Well, three out of five days last week, Jason's Deli fixed supper for us, because I didn't have the time to do it. I need to change that last statement. I had time to do it. At 8:00 at night, which means we would eat around 9:00 or 9:30, and the kids might be in bed by 10:30 or 11:00. That's not fair to my kids or my kids' teachers due to the fact that they would be cranky little monsters the next day. In order to help lighten the food load, this week, I fixed a couple of meals at the beginning of the week for us to eat throughout the week, except on Wednesday  nights. That is our actual "eat out" night.

On to the next subject...my job. I love what I do, for the most part. What I really love is the students! I love the fact that they love coming to my class everyday. I also love the people I work with. What I do not enjoy is the "new" extended school day, the extra meetings, and the other million and a half things that come along with it. There was an article posted by moultrie.com that had teachers say why they wanted to leave the profession of teaching. It's called "Teacher to Parent - Why Teachers Leave".  It hit the nail on the head. Every stitch of it was true. There are so many days where teachers daily lives are consumed by school stuff. So where do our actual families fit in? Or anything in our personal lives for that matter? Many teachers are at the schools for 12 plus hours trying to make sure lesson plans are finished, testing strategies are put in place, data charts are visible, meetings, paperwork, documentations, more paperwork, accommodations are being put into place, along with modifications. Not only that, we have to document for each child with these specific accommodations. We have to make sure we are writing down and showing that we are using each one listed. Now, think about this. Enrichment teachers (PE, music, and art) see every child in the school, and must document for all those with accommodations. Seem crazy yet?

My relationships with my friends suffer because I'm so dadgum tired that instead of finding time to get together with them, I honestly want to go home, lay down, and go to sleep. I love spending time with my friends and will go when I am invited places, but it has been a long time since I have organized any type of dinner with them. It's been a long time since I have put for the effort. It's me. I haven't put forth the effort that needs to be there to make these lasting friendships.

This is just my journey and my experience at this point in my life. Maybe, I'm going through a mid-life crisis :). Or maybe, God has something else in store for me. Or, maybe, I'm already doing what He wants me to do, I just need to find my joy in it again.

So where do us struggling mom's, wives, friends go to when we are feeling like we are in the belly of the whale, and we aren't sure which directions we are being led? I go to God. He is my saving grace because I need it hundreds of times a day. He is the ultimate healer. He is my rock and my foundation. He tells us in Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." He has plans for us. Ultimate amazing plans, if we give Him the chance to work in us and through us. Where does that leave me? Well, God is working on me right now. At this point, I may not have it all figured out, but I know He does.

Bedtime: When the Kids Turn Crazy

Most parents have there own theories about what type of bedtime routine is best for their children. Most people would also say that we put our kiddos to bed way too late, but each family has their own unique situations that determine the bedtime routine. Experts have sent out a chart, which I think is a little crazy because if my child went to bed at 6:40 at night, like the chart tells me to do, he would be up by 3 am. Also, most nights, we are not even home by 6:40 due to different activities. My husband doesn't even get home from work until 7, so would I deprive my kids from spending time with their dad to make sure I follow "the chart"?

Now, our bedtime routine feels like a three ring circus at times, but we are working on that. Having an 11 year who has soccer practice or church activities until 8:00 or 8:30 puts us a little later getting to bed, but I'm not going to make her miss activities she absolutely loves because of a chart. There's also another thing about my kiddos. Two out of our three kids are night owls. They want to know where the party is and how long they can stay. The other child will fall asleep anywhere and at anytime if she is tired. But, if she goes to sleep at 8:30, the child is up at the butt crack of dawn ready to face the day. Well, what about us parents who were up until midnight trying to settle the other two crazies down? That's right! We feel a little exhausted the next day. My man child has decided that sleep is overrated. If he doesn't get settled down until late or has trouble falling asleep, he still gets up super early!!!! Our 11 year old almost has it figured out, but she hasn't quite grasped the concept of going to sleep late on a school night equals being tired and grouchy the next day. In saying that, we do not let her stay up late on school nights. She does go to bed at a decent time, but she doesn't always go to sleep. My oldest daughter also sleep walks if she is exhausted. She has come in to my bedroom at two in the morning, in a panic, to tell me that she needs composition notebooks for math. I told her to go back to bed, not realizing that she was sleep walking, and she came back into my room with a composition notebook to give me an example of the kind of notebook it was. One of my friends and I always joke about how our "wannabe" bedtime routine just isn't working for our families. I found this meme that made me crack up because it describes exactly what we go through each night.

My oldest daughter also tries to get up to get a piece of ice 1,500,092 times so she doesn't have to go to bed when we ask her to. I've decided that maybe I should just be ready with a cup of ice and throw a piece at her if she tries to get up. Maybe, this will deter her from trying to get out of bed again? This is also the time where she remembers that she has homework or a project due the next day. Does anyone else feel my pain? My middle child needs 752 hugs at the exact moment she lays her head down on her pillow. I love her hugs. They are so sweet, but where are they the rest of the evening. She does fall asleep very quickly, but if she can't get settled down, it's on with the hugs. Here's the kicker. My four year old has decided that when he lays down to go to bed, and isn't quite ready to go to sleep, that he forgot to wash his feet and they stink. That's right. He wants to go back into the tub to wash his feet again, and refuses to settle down unless he gets to wash his feet. He will go as far as to stick his feet in my face so that I can see how bad they still smell. Luke literally gets so upset when his feet stink.

I honestly do love bedtime with our kids most nights. I love hearing them say their prayers and them giving us big hugs and kisses.This is probably when they are at their sweetest and want to cuddle a little. As we move into our new home, I'm sure our routine will change again, and some of that is because each of our kids will have their own room, but I hope the prayers, hugs and snuggles will still stay the same!

Mark 9:36-37 says "36 He took a little child whom he placed among them. Taking the child in his arms, he said to them, 37 "Whoever welcomes on of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who send me.'"

I do welcome my children, but we definitely have some work to do. So those of you who are struggling with the bedtime routine, know that you are NOT alone in your struggle!!!

For the Love of a Tween...

 Every day, I look forward to picking up my kids from daycare and school. My oldest daughter is 11, and she has swim team every afternoon for her athletics class. Each morning, I tell her to grab a snack, because I know and she knows that after swim, she will be hungry. So, I go pick her up, and the first thing she says to me is, "Did you bring me a snack?" Is she serious? Didn't we just have this discussion EVERY morning since school started? After I tell her that I did not bring her a snack because this is her responsibility, there is a MAJOR dramatic breakdown. There's such anger. The tears start flowing, and I get to hear how every other mom provides snacks for their kids when they pick them up, which leads into how much more fun the other moms are than me. This child is extremely motivated, driven, and responsible. She is also kind and caring to everyone OUTSIDE of our family. She's always been sassy, but when she turned 11, the world revolves around her, or at least in her opinion it does. When I was a pre-teen, aka tween, I don't remember being dramatic like this, and my parents have agreed. I wasn't. Believe me. I have asked because there are so many days when I'm at a loss for what to say or do. If I wanted to cry about something, I would go in my room and hide so no one knew I was crying. So, I'm at a loss on how to handle some of the things going on in our lives.

Now, when I say dramatic, I mean like standing on a Broadway stage, acting her heart out, especially for the crying and yelling scenes. My constant question at this point is, "where did this creature come from?" Now, I don't think of my children as creatures 95% of the time, but when there is soap opera/horror movie drama going on in my house with our "tween", that's exactly what I feel like they are. She is a wild animal that cannot be, or does not have the desire to be tamed.

How do we get through these years without going to fist city in the front yard? Because I'm going to tell you, with some of the stuff that flies out of my sixth grader's mouth, the only thing holding me back is Jesus! It has to be, because at that moment, I want to fly at her like a spider monkey "all jacked up on Mt. Dew"! (That is one of my favorite lines from Talladega Nights!) Most of the time, I try to stay fairly calm, but this is probably one of the most challenging parts parenting for me.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to "pray without ceasing". Honestly, my prayer is that both of us make it through the next few years alive, and that she will not argue with EVERYTHING!!!! And in turn, my biggest problem is cutting her off in the middle of a rant, or as she calls it, a concern, that is obviously important to her, and giving my opinion about things. So basically, I'm not listening to her to really listen, I'm listening and thinking about what my reply is going to be. This is something that I am really working on, and it is super hard.

So here are a few questions I have for all of you tween moms:

1) What do you do when you take your tween out shopping, they pick out the clothes they like (and are appropriate), then when it comes time to wear them (the NEXT day), they don't like them anymore? Mine also tells me that she really didn't pick them out, so that's why she doesn't like them. I was standing right there. YOU did pick them out, and you were excited about the clothes. OMG!!!

2) What do you do when your tween has the gift of standing up for what she believes in, but at this point in life, some of it is completely unreasonable, ridiculous, and does it in the completely wrong way? My child will make a great lawyer some day with her phenomenal arguing skills, but she uses them at totally wrong times. We are going to have to work on when it is appropriate to use these skills.

3) What response do you give when the their world is ending because there are no BBQ chips, strawberries, or good (in her terms) ranch dressing in the house? This may sound crazy to you, but to my child, this is a legitimate issue to get upset about. I know, it's actually insane, but in her mind, her tween world is ending.

4) How do we handle the crying outburst when they cannot decide on a food selection from a menu or what clothes to wear (because they have no good clothes because they picked them at the store but don't like them one day later)? One of my dear friends told me her 12 year old daughter had a teary breakdown at a restaurant because she just could not decide on what to order. There is no reason for the indecisiveness, and there is no reason for it to be there, and it comes out of nowhere, and there is nothing we can say or do to stop it!!! Oh, dear Jesus help us!!!!

So, in the meantime, if y'all could just say a prayer for all the tween parents out there, we would all appreciate it!!!!

Side note: I love my kids dearly, and we have so much to be thankful for, but we are a family that deals with real issues.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18  16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

The Hungry Family Games

"Chick-Fil-A, I could eat there seven times a day. 

Where the people laugh and children play, 

Oh I'm in love with Chick-Fil-A." 

~Tim Hawkins

Y'all! I do love Chick-Fil-A!!! And, love it just about as much as I love college football, which that glorious season has started!!! GO CLEMSON TIGERS!!!! I have always loved Chick-Fil-A. My kids love it, too, and we don't get tired of eating there. I mean it's pretty much the most healthy fast food, right?!? Oh, and those wonderful waffle fries! I love them! For the most part, we eat fairly healthy, but there are weeks we eat out almost every night. 

People can tell me "Oh, you should do crockpot meals." Or, "you should do meal prep on the weekends." Sometimes, I do that, but there are weekends where I flat don't feel like it, or we are busy, and I am just tired. Remember, I teach school, so I leave the house before seven in the morning to get to daycare to drop Luke off, then, to my school and don't leave until 4, sometimes 4:30. Then, there's soccer practices, church, piano, gymnastics, and for me, working out. Add my four year old little boy into the mix, too, because he is a little wild and crazy, and we are building a house. And crockpot meals would be fantastic, except, when we are getting home around 7:30 or 8, it takes more time to fix the sides that go with it. We wouldn't actually get to eat the meal until around 9. And, I really do love to cook, especially, bake, but at this phase of our lives, time isn't on my side. There needs to be a couple of more hours in a day. So, in saying all of this, we end up picking something up for supper. But, one place I refuse to eat is McDonald's. I won't eat there. I'll only drink their coffee. That's a discussion for another post altogether. 

                               (Red Velvet Cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory!It was glorious!)

I'm also madly in love with sweets!! My girls are too! Luke likes some sweets but prefers chips or popcorn to any sweets. If I hadn't seen him be born from my body, I would question if he was mine. My grandmother was and my mama is an amazing cook! It helped to lead me down this path of dessert righteousness. We can eat a meal where I'm completely stuffed, but if there's a dessert, I'm going to have some. There was an instance where I went with a group of teachers to a leadership conference in Dallas, so we went to The Cheesecake Factory. I had a meal and was completely full, so I ordered a piece of cheesecake "to go". Well, we sat there talking for a little while, and before I know it, the cheesecake is gone. Yep! I had eaten every single bite! And eating desserts is worth every extra sprint and ab workout that I have to do to balance it out. (Side note: I do work out as many days of the weeks as I can. It gives me a good transition between my school kids and my own kids. It releases endorphins, is a stress reliever, my clothes continue to fit, and everyone else is happier because I'm happier.) 

Also, sometimes, I let my kids have dessert first. There are days, every once in a blue moon, that we have junk food night. The kids can pick what they want to eat, and we watch a movie. And my kids get to have one, and only one, soft drink on the weekends. They can pick the day, but once they have it, that's it. They can't have another one until the next weekend. There has to be some kind of balance, right?!? :)

So, if you are having one of those weeks, just know you are not alone! I actually took left over Little Cesar's pizza for lunch yesterday because that was our Tuesday night meal, but my friend, Brittany, went to pick up Chick-Fil-A for us, instead. So, I had my usual #1 with extra pickles and an unsweet tea. Y'all have a great weekend, enjoy some college football, and maybe, I'll be able to cook a few meals this next week. 

"So I commend the enjoyment of life, because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany them in their toil all the days of the life God has given them under the sun." ~Ecclesiastes 8:15

Dear Girls Wearing Shorts with Your Butts, Literally, Hanging Out

Dear Girls Wearing Shorts with Your Butts, Literally, Hanging Out,


        Why? Why do you wear these micro shorts? I'm going to admit, I don't understand why anyone would want to wear them. And, I'm really not trying to be mean or ugly. I'm not talking about the shorts that come down to your finger tips when you stand up. I'm not talking about the ones that are a little above your mid-thigh. I'm talking about the shorts that are so short, they almost look like a swimsuit bottom. The shorts where you can see the crease of the butt and the bottom part of the butt cheek hanging out. They look extremely uncomfortable. It looks like you would have a constant crack attack. Now, most young girls have these cute little bodies, but why is it okay for us to see their butts hanging out? I do own a pair of blue jean shorts and several pairs of workout shorts, but you cannot see my rear hanging out, and I make sure you can see my shorts when I pick out the shirt I'm wearing. There's a way to look hot and classy at the same time. I love fashion and will be happy to be a consultant :)

A few months ago, I went shopping for my two girls, ages 9 and 11. When I was looking around, I swear I had walked into "Hookers 'R Us". The shorts and dresses were unbelievably short. It was crazy. And on top of that, they were more expensive than the longer shorts I found at another store. We only found a few t-shirts and few pairs of jeans because I cannot bring myself to buy these kinds of clothes for my kids. My husband also told me that he would give me $1000 for clothes to make sure our girls didn't dress like that. Annnnnddd, he would choke me if I came in the house with these clothes for them. Here is a pair of shorts for an 8 year old girl...

You tell me that it's okay to send my 9 year old daughter out into public wearing these.

So, to these short short wearing people, I have some questions for you, and I'm being totally serious:

1.  Is your butt hot natured? I'm serious! Do you stay hot if you cover the whole butt cheek up? Does it need a breeze to stay cool?


2. Does your butt need to breathe, so it can't be covered up? Does your butt feel like it's smothering? If you cover it up, will it shrivel up and go away because it dies from lack of air? Is that what you're afraid of? That your butt will disappear if you cover it up?


3. Do you think that this attracts guys? I mean, I'm sure it will attract guys, but are they attracted to you for the right reasons, or are they attracted to you because they can already see everything you've got? You are beautiful inside and out! Don't let someone judge you from the way your butt hangs out of your shorts.


4. I agree that these shorts may be okay to wear down to the beach or to the lake, but why do you want to wear them to the mall or even the grocery store? Or back to school night? Yes, I sure did see several pairs at a MIDDLE SCHOOL back to school night.

God tells us in Corinthians 6:19-20, "Do you know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom  you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies." Be careful what you show to others. Guard yourself and guard your heart. You belong to God, and He wants us to be a reflection of Him.

That Love-Hate Relationship with Walmart

Why can't I stay away from this place? It's like a bad boyfriend that you know you shouldn't hang out with, but you keep going back. It's not like we don't have comparable stores here in town, but I can't NOT go there. It's like a moth to a flame. Is it the good prices? The well stocked shelves, especially of Krispy Kreme Smooth coffee? The fact that you can get a cup of popcorn chicken at the deli, when you're starving after work, and walk around and eat it while you shop? Is it the perfectly priced clothes for kids who grow out of them in what feels like 2 days? Or maybe it's because you can grocery shop and shop for clothes in the same store?

Now, shopping at Walmart has its good points, but I have some suggestions that may help to make the shopping experience A LOT better, especially for parents. Because I'm going to tell you, right now, it's complete torture to go in there with my kids.


Here are my suggestions, and they are only suggestions, but I think they are pretty dadgum good ones:

1. For the love of dixie, open up more registers!!! If you aren't going to open all or at least half of them during your busiest hours, then don't build as many registers. It's a waste of money, and it's frustrating to look around and see that 40 registers exist, yet only 3-5 are open at any given time. This is the time that our kids really start pitching fits, especially since you keep saying no to the 100 pieces of candy and toys that they've picked up while waiting in line. They are getting antsy waiting in a line that is 8 people deep, all with buggies FULL of groceries. So, the frustration level was just taken to the next level. Also, please teach the cashiers to at least speak to the customers. They hardly even smile, which I find sad. Do you need to offer them some type of incentive so that they want to look happy? Sometimes, it's hard to even get them to smile. Now, I do understand that everyone has hard days, even hard lives, but please, if someone speaks to you, speak back. That is just simple manners.


2. Provide childcare. For a small fee that is. I would spend the extra money for the care just so it would take me 30 minutes, and not an hour and a half, to go shopping. There also wouldn't be random toys or bags of candy that mysteriously appear  in the cart. Oh, and having to pull at least one of my kids off of a shelf, or trying to get them to quit fighting with each other, or ramming the cart into the back of my ankles. I honestly don't know how I have made it this long without having to have surgery on my achilles tendon. I'm totally serious. And the tears and yelling because I'm not letting them get 100 different kinds of cookies or cereal.


3. Serve Xanax or a stiff drink to the moms/dads that enter the store with kids. I promise you would see a lot more smiles from the parents. Or here's another good idea. Just give free wine and beer samples in the wine aisle and at the beer fridge. You would see some parents who were a lot less stressed and a lot more excited to go into Walmart. You would probably also have a lot more customers, period.


People wonder why it causes me anxiety to take my sweet, precious children shopping with me until they see me in the store with all 3 of them. Then they don't wonder anymore. Ask the friends who saw me walking around Walmart yesterday with my 4 year old. It's not a pretty sight. Seriously!